ironic

Friday the 13th to many is eerie and presents a looming bad luck, but to me a Friday the 13th just brings sweet memories of a man I miss so dearly. It just so happened that this past Friday, August 13, 2010 did just that and so much more.

Not only was I celebrating my late uncle’s birthday and realizing how great of a life he did live regardless of the pain and suffering a stupid disease caused him, I also turned the page to a new chapter of life. I moved in with my oldest and dearest friend, Jamie (ironic we have the same name… I know) and Lauren, a new and already cherished friend. Through chaos and heat we all got our stuff in that apartment and have a fresh start.

It was weird to entertain my happiness because I at last had my own space in Nashville, while mourning not having my uncle’s physical presence to celebrate the day he made his entrance into the world. I was making a huge step to where I want to be in life while he doesn’t even get to relish his own earthly life. It was conflicting to say the least and made me miss him that much more.

Everyone seems to be close to their families these days and they can’t live without them. What if you truly didn’t have any of those significant people that are so influential on the person who are? What if the one person you want to sit down with and just recap your daily events isn’t around whatsoever? It’s been a year and a month or two since the man that I looked up to so much left me. Even though we knew that his battle was nearing an end, I still hadn’t soaked up the fact that I would never be able to wrap my arms around him any more or share are sarcasm and wit together. All I physically have now is a necklace holding some of his ashes and not his hugs of laughter. He was a jack of all trades and remarkably genuine inspiration to take on anything and everything I wanted no matter what everyone else said.

He is someone I will never forget. He is one of those people regardless of being family are not, he made his mark on my heart that will last forever more. I miss you Uncle Buddy but know my heart lives every day to be a woman just like you... fearless in love.